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Since I’m easing back in to blogging, it might be boring for a while.

Tim and I have been talking a lot about the future. Saving. Houses. Babies. Moving. GOALS.

Our biggest goal for 2013 is a financial one. Tim has worked really hard and done very well at his job over the last year. I am one lucky SOB and have managed to find and do well at a job that I really enjoy (most of the time.) These circumstances combined with Tim’s amazing spreadsheets and guidance have put us in a really good position right now. A really unique and rare position for newlyweds our age, actually. I am eternally grateful for that quality in Tim. His planning ability combined and my realism is a great combination. Together we are laying out a plan for our life together that will make us able to weather almost any storm – at least financially – and it’s no big secret that financial stress and arguments about money often lead otherwise unhappy couples straight to Splitsville. I truly feel like if that part of our life is predictable and reliable, it will be much easier to maintain a happy and healthy relationship.

Lately, I have been worried about this because I know that my current income is part of the reason we are able to save so aggressively and I really believe that the plan we have made is the best one for us. It’s troubling because my job is extremely stressful. I feel almost constantly overwhelmed and can’t remember the last time I was completely caught up on everything. That is kind of the nature of my job and I am certainly not alone in my plight – all of my coworkers feel the same way. Like we are just making it through sometimes.

Like I said, I love most aspects of my job and I feel that I am in the right place, but knowing that in the next few years we will likely relocate or have a baby (and part of our plan is to create a scenario where I can stay home when our babies are small), I struggle to justify to myself if it is all worth it if there is an expiration date. I have been exploring other possibilities and trying to decide what is right for Tim and I and just keep going in circles. Of course, I want to put us in a position to be able to do the things we want and build a life together. To buy a house, to have kids, to travel together, and to do all these things without having to struggle through or live paycheck to paycheck. More importantly, I know that our financial stability is not negotiable in Tim’s eyes. It is more than a goal to him. He does not feel stable or secure without it. Doing my part to reach those goals is the biggest way I can show him that our marriage is my top priority. Tim does a lot to ensure my happiness. This is the most important way for me to return the favor.


I just don’t know if I can keep up this speed for two more years! I wish I could see the future and know if leaving my job or changing my path would lead us to certain ruin. Obviously, that is probably unlikely. Certain ruin is a pretty strong phrase.


About katetatumbailey

I am a flygirl raised in ATL, living in SFO, and working out of NYC. Follow me

2 responses »

  1. Personally the threat of “certain ruin” is inextricably tied to living for the future! You have now and you have much and only you know whether your time should be spent doing something else. Faith and love can assist in carrying you through to whatever it is you might be doing otherwise. Look around you –I know you know you are blessed-be at peace with that. I have to say I have been there…which is why I share this. But having said all that I am so excited to be coming out there to enjoy THANKSGIVING–appropriate I say…

  2. Nothing in life is predictable. And I know the family you came from its mine. You crave stability. In your search for that don’t throw away all the fun you would have if you live in the uncertainty. I love you. You have a life most of could only dream of and I miss our days of only going outside to smoke (me) in the city that never sleeps watching hoarders praying stinky feet wouldn’t come home! Mwah!!!


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